Trailer Trash!

YOU KNOW YOU'RE TRAILER TRASH WHEN . . .

1. The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more
    teeth than your spouse.

2. You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner
    table in front of her kids.

3. You've been married three times and still have the same
    in-laws.

4. You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on
    a different night.

5. Jack Daniel makes your list of "Most Admired People."

6. You think Genitalia is an Italian airline.

7. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so
    clean.

8. Anyone in your family ever died right after saying, "Hey
    y'all, watch this."

9. Your Junior/Senior Prom had daycare.

10. You think the last words to The Star Spangled Banner
      are, "Gentlemen, start your engines."

11. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house
      exploded right off its wheels.

12. You had to remove a toothpick for your wedding
      pictures.

13. The bluebook value of your truck goes up and down,
      depending on how much gas it has in it.

14. You have to go outside to get something out of the
      'fridge.

15. One of your kids was born on a pool table.

16. You need one more hole punched in your card to get a
      freebie at the House of Tattoos.

17. Ya can't get married to yer sweetheart 'cause there's a
      law against it.

18. You dated one of your parents' current spouses in high
      school.

19. You think loading the dishwasher means getting your
      wife drunk.

20. Your school fight song is "Dueling Banjos."

21. Your toilet paper has page numbers on it